I was scrolling through my instagram stories as usual and came across a story by one of my new friend. She asked what were the stages of healing just the way there are stages of grief and that got me thinking.

I came up with two sets of stages but then went with the ones that talked about the emotions vs. the sentences that I thought of at first.

Five stages of healing iteration one looked like this:

🌱 1. Awareness

“Something’s not right.”
This is the moment you first acknowledge that there’s a wound which is emotional, physical, or spiritual. It could come with pain, confusion, or a sudden clarity. This stage might feel like a wake-up call.

🌊 2. Sitting with the Pain

“I have to feel this to heal this.”
Here, you face the discomfort instead of pushing it away. It might look like crying, journaling, or talking it out. This stage is raw and vulnerable and you’re letting yourself feel fully, not bypassing anything.

🔍 3. Understanding & Reframing

“Why did this happen?”
You begin to explore the root causes… like peeling the layers of onion…childhood patterns, trauma, conditioning. Maybe therapy or introspection helps you rewrite the stories you’ve been telling yourself. There’s insight here, and often, relief.

🔧 4. Integration & Action

“I get to choose differently now.”
With awareness and understanding, you start making changes…slowly setting boundaries, adapting new habits, finding different ways of relating to yourself and others. Healing becomes visible in your actions.

🌞 5. Renewal

“I’m not who I was, and that’s okay.”
You emerge with a deeper sense of self, maybe even gratitude. You’re not “back to normal” but you’re transformed. Honestly, what even is back to normal? The person you were before you healed? When was that? Do you remember that life? Anyway, you are transformed and there’s peace, softness, and strength.

Five stages of healing iteration two:

💫 1. Recognition (Emotion: Confusion / Awakening)

“Something’s off, but I can’t quite name it.”
The start of healing often feels like emotional static. There is unease, restlessness, or vague sadness. You begin to wake up to pain you once ignored.

Core Emotion: Confusion, curiosity, vulnerability

💔 2. Release (Emotion: Sadness / Pain)

“This hurts more than I expected.”
You let yourself grieve what was lost. It could be safety, trust, identity, time. This is the emotional purge: crying, aching, letting go. It’s messy but necessary.

Core Emotion: Sorrow, grief, emotional overwhelm.

🔍 3. Reflection (Emotion: Clarity / Empowerment)

“I think I’m beginning to understand.”
The emotional fog lifts. You start connecting dots, realizing truths, and feeling more grounded. This is the “aha” moment phase.

Core Emotion: Clarity, insight, empowerment.

🛠️ 4. Rebuilding (Emotion: Hope / Determination)

“I’m making changes. This time, it’s different.”
You begin to trust yourself again. Hope is tender but growing. You set boundaries, shift habits, speak differently. Healing becomes active.

Core Emotion: Hope, motivation, self-respect.

🌞 5. Rebirth (Emotion: Peace / Wholeness)

“I’ve come home to myself.”
Not everything is perfect, but you feel whole. You carry scars with softness. You’ve woven your pain into wisdom. There’s light again.

Core Emotion: Peace, strength, self-love

Honestly it can take forever to get from stage 1 to stage 5 and at times it is non-linear… you might feel like you have healed but then there is yet another layer that you need to peel off.

Journal prompts for each stage of healing

🌘 1. Recognition

• What’s been quietly calling for my attention?
• Is there a part of me I’ve been ignoring or numbing?
• How does my body respond when I slow down and listen?

🌧️ 2. Release

• What emotions have I been holding back lately?
• What am I grieving? List it even if it feels small or unseen.
• If I could cry, scream, or write it all out, what would I say?

🔎 3. Reflection

• What patterns do I notice about how I’ve coped with this pain?
• What have I learned about myself from this experience?
• What story do I want to stop telling myself?

🌱 4. Rebuilding

• What does healing look like in action for me?
• What boundaries, habits, or beliefs do I need to shift?
• How can I show up for myself — even just today?

☀️ 5. Rebirth

• What qualities in me have grown stronger through this?
• What am I proud of myself for?
• What version of myself is emerging, and how can I honour her/him/them?