Unlearning things is as important as learning new things. Why? Because somethings serve you only for some period of time while other things that you have learned are just plain wrong but you did not realise when you learnt them.

I am currently watching this KDrama called Doctor Cha and I can see that she is doing so many things that are hurting her mental health but just doesn’t know how to live differently and at the same time she is also unlearning and changing so that she can build a better life for herself and her family. Watching this drama made me write this post.

Though there are a lot things that need to be unlearned here I have complied a list of 6 such things. I hope this post serves as a reminder for you to unlearn things that are harming your peace.

6 Things to Unlearn for Better Mental Health

1. Ignoring your own boundaries to please others

This can lead to a range of negative outcomes. It can result in resentment, as we compromise our needs and desires, leading to emotional distress. Additionally, it often means neglecting our own self-care, which can have adverse effects on our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Ultimately, failing to establish and honour our boundaries can erode our sense of self and harm our overall quality of life.

2. Making yourself smaller to fit social situations

By constantly diminishing your true self to conform to societal expectations or gain acceptance, you deny your unique perspectives and contributions. It perpetuates a cycle of self-neglect and prevents you from embracing your full potential. Embracing your authentic self allows for meaningful connections, self-empowerment, and the opportunity to inspire others by embodying the belief that you are deserving of love and acceptance just as you are.

3. Pretending that you are fine instead of asking for support

It is important to unlearn pretending that you are fine instead of asking for support because it perpetuates a harmful cycle of suppressing emotions and isolating oneself. Pretending to be fine when you’re struggling not only denies you the opportunity to receive the help and support you may need, but it also creates a false perception that you must face challenges alone. By unlearning this behaviour, you open yourself up to vulnerability and allow others to offer support, empathy, and understanding. Seeking help when needed promotes mental and emotional well-being, strengthens relationships, and fosters a sense of belonging and interconnectedness.

4. Believing that your self-worth depends on your productivity

Believing that your self-worth depends on your productivity should be unlearned because it perpetuates a harmful mindset that ties your value as a person solely to external achievements. Your worth as an individual is inherent and independent of your productivity or accomplishments. This belief can lead to a constant cycle of self-pressure, burnout, and dissatisfaction, as you may never feel “good enough” unless you are constantly productive. Unlearning this mindset allows you to cultivate self-compassion, prioritize your well-being, and embrace your intrinsic value as a human being, separate from societal expectations of productivity. It enables you to define success on your own terms and engage in activities that bring you joy, fulfillment, and a balanced life.

5. Not celebrating your achievements because other have better ones

Not celebrating your achievements because others have better ones should be unlearned because it diminishes your self-worth and diminishes the value of your own accomplishments. Comparing your achievements to others is a self-defeating mindset that robs you of the joy, pride, and sense of accomplishment that you deserve. Every person’s journey is unique, and focusing on others’ achievements undermines your own progress and growth. Instead, embracing a mindset of self-appreciation allows you to acknowledge and celebrate your own milestones, fostering a positive self-image, boosting confidence, and cultivating a supportive environment for personal development. Each step forward, no matter how small, is worthy of recognition and celebration.

6. Distracting from hard feelings instead of processing them

One should unlearn distracting from hard feelings instead of processing them because avoiding or suppressing difficult emotions can have detrimental effects on mental and emotional well-being. Distractions may provide temporary relief, but they prevent us from truly understanding and addressing the underlying causes of our emotions. By allowing ourselves to sit with and process challenging feelings, we can gain insight into their origin and meaning, leading to personal growth and self-awareness. Processing emotions helps us develop healthy coping mechanisms, build resilience, and cultivate emotional intelligence. It allows us to develop a greater understanding of ourselves and our needs, leading to more authentic and fulfilling connections with others. Ultimately, by unlearning the habit of distraction, we can foster emotional well-being and develop healthier ways of managing and navigating our emotions.

That’s all from me.

What’s something that you are unlearning?